How To Write With Anxiety

Good luck getting anything productive done

Some days my words flow like fine wine, and others like frigid molasses. On the days when writing seems impossible, I am often fighting a losing battle with anxiety.

The other day, my anxiety was so severe that I was lying on my back on the cold tile floor. My breathing was rapid and shallow. Despite the air conditioner and the cold leeching into my body from the floor, I was sweating. My mind was spinning from the thoughts pummeling me. I was like my brain was streaming 100 Netflix shows at the same time.

Any thoughts of writing had left my mind. I was trying to survive.

I lay like that for some time — an hour, maybe two.

The first thing I tried to do was control my breathing. My head was twirling, and I started hyperventilating. I felt if I didn’t get my respiration under control I would most likely pass out.

I knew I wouldn’t die, but it felt like it.

As far as I know, no one has ever died from anxiety or a panic attack

I started deep breathing, and after a few minutes, I could feel the pain loosening in my chest. I continued focusing on my breath for some time. I was starting to feel my thoughts coming under control. One hundred voices turned into a few. Then, I was able to open my eyes.

My wife was standing over me. When she saw the blue of my eyes, she asked, “Are you dead?”

She’s always had a sense of humor at the strangest times.

I assured her I was, in fact, dead, and rolled over on my stomach. The feel of the chilled floor on my face was heaven, so I lingered.

I was able to stand, and seeing I would be okay, my wife retreated to the other room. I was still very anxious but at least 80% better than I was a few minutes ago.

I knew I need to do something to take my mind off what was going on in my body. I thought about taking a walk, but my legs were jelly, and I didn’t think I would make it far.

I sat on the edge of the bed and grabbed my journal off the desk. I uncapped the pen and started to write.

Related posts:

passei o dia ouvindo no repeat uma música calminha da Julia Michaels chamada anxiety e parece que ela descreve o meu dia a dia como pessoa com ansiedade. do momento em que acordo até o que vou dormir…

The old man walks every day, averaging five or more miles, every season, except when the weather is really bad. He doesn’t walk in the rain. A little dog — a mini-Aussie — is his steadfast companion…

We are in the age of the Blockchain, even if time must pass since this is affirmed with force. A bit like the internet in the end of the 90s. Well now there is an opportunity linked to the blockchain…